The cops were called.
It was his third time. One of the officers who responded was also there the first two times.
He didn’t do anything wrong.
He was a single father who simply wanted to spend time with his daughter. They were at the park.
The nearby mothers kept their distance. They glared and talked amongst themselves.
People assume the worst. They see a man with children and automatically think about pedophilia.
Now, it is great that the public has their eyes peeled for suspicious activities. People have good intentions. They want to protect children.
However, people are still not used to seeing a man alone with children.
Men have become hyper-aware of this perception. They are hesitant to help any child in distress.
Instead, they look for a woman nearby and ask if she can help.
“Men are always horny.”
Random, unprovoked erections happen all the time. Puberty will always be an awkward time for males.
Imagine getting erections in the middle of math class while doing algebraic equations. No, solving for X does not turn us on. Our bodies are simply out of whack because of all the raging hormones going on.
Things like this also happen in adulthood, although less frequently. Again, it has nothing to do with sexual arousal. All we can do is act casually and wait for the moment to pass.
Sometimes, we are just not in the mood. There is nothing wrong with us. There is also nothing wrong with you as a partner. It has nothing to do with your attractiveness or sexual desirability.
We are just out of it. We have off days just like anyone else. We may be too tired to function. We may just want to crash on the couch and not do anything.
“Men and women can’t just be friends.”
Yes, platonic friendships between men and women exist. However, both parties must have the same intentions. Neither party can be secretly attracted to the other.
People with secret feelings want to start as friends, and then transition to a romantic relationship. The platonic friendship can only survive if these intentions do not exist.
You are just trying to establish a connection with another human being.
Platonic friendships have so many perks. For example, sometimes, a man wants to see a woman’s perspective on an issue. She can help solve problems and broaden his worldview. He can do the same for her.
In addition, the woman can be the man’s best wing person. She can introduce him to some of her single friends. Not only will she make introductions, but she will also vouch for him. She will talk about his best qualities.
“Real men don’t cry.”
I am glad mental health awareness is now becoming mainstream. Historically, it was not considered manly to show emotion.
Fortunately, the narrative is changing. Keeping emotions bottled up inside isn’t healthy. These emotions build up. People then become tempted to do drastic things.
Sometimes, men also need a shoulder to cry on. We need someone to listen to us and reassure us that everything will be alright.
Being emotional should not take anything away from our manliness.
If anything, it showcases our authenticity.
This post was previously published on medium.com.
You may also like these posts on The Good Men Project:
|White Fragility: Talking to White People About Racism||Escape the “Act Like a Man” Box||The Lack of Gentle Platonic Touch in Men’s Lives is a Killer||What We Talk About When We Talk About Men|
Photo credit: Dimitar Belchev on Unsplash
The post Delete These Wrongful Assumptions About Men appeared first on The Good Men Project.